Wednesday, April 4, 2018

How to be comfortable dating your lesbian girlfriend

Your lesbian love deserves to be expressed


Its hard to ignore… the stares, the whispering, the threats, the comments like oh look at the lesbo or look at those lezzies over there.

When I go on a date with my girlfriend, I hold her hand because I love her. I don’t hold her hand to throw my sexuality it in anyone’s face. So why are people so quick to make us feel bad for being in love?

lesbian selfie pictures
Lesbians making out in public

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That’s just the thing… we don’t need to feel bad but instead we deserve to feel  great!

Now, I want to approach this issue in the most unbiased manner that is possible. I don’t want to place all of the blame on people who do not support gays but at the same time I don’t want to place it all on  lesbians and gay girls. I simply want to address some of the main issues we run into with this subject and what can be done to ease our worries.

I’m sure many of you have encountered that one person who really doesn’t like your decision to “publicly exploit your homosexual lifestyle”. 

First and foremost, it is always best to handle these situations with dignity. Don’t be so quick to snap at them like they did to you because that just gives them the upper hand. If we ever expect to receive respect in public (and elsewhere) we must show it as well. The best way to approach this issue is realize that there is no point in trying to fight their violence with more violence. 

We are disgusting lesbian sluts


I remember being with my girlfriend of 8 months and we were in Wal-Mart of all places just shopping for car tires. I was holding her hand in the store and a lady followed closely behind us and started yelling that we were disgusting lesbian sluts and wrong and that what we were doing was scarring not to just children but specifically to her child.

lesbian selfie pictures
Self pictures of lesbian girlfriends

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You are just out on a date with your girlfriend, you aren’t out corrupting children or smiting God so don’t fall into those silly hate-fueled statements. One of the challenges of being a same-sex couple let alone a lesbian couple  is harnessing the fact that you really are normal. 

Please know that when I say “normal” that I do not mean you are just some plain, old, boring couple. I just mean normal in a sense that the love we feel for our partners is no different than the love that a man and woman can feel in a heterosexual partnership.

Also know that I’m not asking you to fake any sort of feelings or to pretend to be something you’re not. In fact, I am asking you to do the complete opposite by just being yourself with your partner in public. This way, the pieces will fall into place. I realize that sometimes it’s easier said than done and depending on your location, your age, race etc., you may find it harder to feel normal but trust me, that part of you exists and once you find it you’ll feel that instant switch where all of a sudden everything just seems to make sense. 'you are a normal girl who likes girls.


lesbian selfie pictures
Sexy lesbians in bikinis kissing in public

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Kissing your gay girlfriend and holding hands is normal


As humans, we tend to feed on people’s emotions, body language, presentation, etc. As a lesbian, we must realize that we aren’t just fed on, we are preyed on and this needs to be the reason that we do what we do best and that is be proud. Don't be afraid to show you love in public kissing your gay girlfriend and holding hands is normal.

I think, on some level, girls who like girls have  issues because it is hard to step out of the comfort of our own homes into a world where we don’t know if we are going to get jumped for simply having our arms around our lesbian partner. I know that is something we all think about probably daily. If you find that you are having a particularly hard time gaining that comfort level there are some things you can do to loosen up and feel more confident:

Remember the reason you’re on the date. You are on the date to cherish your  gay girl and make her happy, not to make others happy by keeping a separation rule.

lesbian selfie pictures
Kissing in public - girls who like girls

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You’re being judged, yes, but by who? Not your lesbian date but by complete strangers that play no role in your day-to-day life.  You are a lesbian and you are on a date with a girl who likes girls - Screw everyone else!

Here you are on a date with a beautiful woman while they sit and are so out-of-touch with their own lives.

Giving undying attention to your  gay girlfriend and not the others around you as much as you can help it. You’ll find that once you focus on her that you don’t even have to try to be comfortable.

Group  lesbian dating can make it easier


Last but not least… you have to keep in mind that your partner is feeding off of your emotions. If you let these outside people get to you, then they will probably get to her and then you two will get to each other and it will be a big mess! Be comfortable so she can be as well!

lesbian selfie pictures
Girls who like girls - Gay girlfriends

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There is always safety in numbers and having a group  lesbian date can make it easier for you to find that comfort but once you do, make sure to treat your girl to a one-on-one date where you can show off just how comfortable you are with her.

lesbian selfie pictures
Girl on girl kissing

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Lesbian kissing and making out
Girls who kiss girls


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If you would like extra guidance... I highly  recommend that you grab yourself a copy of The Lesbian Lifestyle Book. It is the only guide you will ever need as a lesbian or bisexual woman. - Click Here


Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Come out of the closet and be the lesbian you were meant to be

Ah, yes. The awkward “coming out” time. Every lesbian  has this time. And for those of you still snuggled tightly within your closet, I promise you’ll find a new found lightness and confidence once you peek out into the rest of the world and find your place within the lesbian  community.


lesbian selfie pictures
Lesbian selfie picture


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In fact, there are plenty of lesbians and bisexual women who are openly gay who are not all the way comfortable with actually being lesbian  and what that means both to them and to those around them.


Come out of the closet and let people know you are lesbian


The good news is that you’re  here, so just know that we are 100% dedicated to helping you beautiful ladies out. Just come on out of that stuffy closet.  Luckily, in that “awkward time” I previously mentioned, I had a couple of friends who were already “out,” and I also had friends who were incredibly supportive. I thank them with all of my heart and am glad they were in my life at the time they were, even though mostly we have drifted apart now. I’ll always love them and be forever grateful. 


girls who like girls touching another girls tits
Public lesbians kissing


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Work your way to the more difficult conversations, such as with less open-minded people or with parents/family. Trust me and believe me when I say that I know how terrifying planning all of this stuff can be. Keep in mind how huge  this secret is, and know that the people who really love you will be okay with your sexuality, even if it takes them a while, which brings me to the next thing to help you “deal” with that fact that you are a girl who likes girls.

True  friends will love you whether  you are lesbian or not


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girls who like girls touching another girls tits


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This is the part that sucks. A lot. At the time, it seems like it will never get better and nothing can be fixed and all you want to do is yell “I was kidding! I’m not really gay!” but, I can promise going back on your declaration of lesbianism will not fix your problems, and it would just close you up in that closet so much tighter. The awesome news is that we, as humans, tend to well. . . imagine and plan for the worst, so the terrible scenarios you’re thinking will happen in your head won’t happen. Take a deep breath now and know that if your “friends” truly love you, they will love you regardless if you are lesbian or not.

Keep in mind how worth it it’s going to be when you’re totally honest with both yourself and everyone around you and you will no longer having this big (rainbow colored) dark cloud hanging over your head! Know that some people just won’t get it, and so, might not get you. Remember what I said about giving them some space if they need it, because the odds of them coming back multiply greatly if they truly love you.

lesbian selfie pictures
girls who like girls kissing 


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Plan how you will tell people you are a lesbian


I know this part can seem kind of silly, since the talks we usually plan for never happen. I know that many times I have planned out conversations (usually in the bathtub – my thinking space) and thought I totally had every possible scenario planned out, and well, I didn’t. However, knowing exactly what you want to say can help you so much, especially when you sit down with that not-so-easy-to-talk-to friend you have and they’re staring at you expectantly and your mind goes totally *blank*. In fact, if you need to, take someone who knows with you for support, or write down some of what you want to say, but it is definitely worth telling them in person. , ,   Read more

Practice on close friends who you think will accept that you are lesbian


This is crucial and builds confidence. After coming out to a few close friends who have your back and love you even more for being honest and brave enough to come clean to them, you’ll have a few allies and be more prepared for the harder talks, plus it’s true that practice seriously does make perfect.

Do your research about girls who like girls coming out


lesbian selfie pictures
lesbians kissing in public


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Look up how other  gay women come out to those they care about. Look up how lesbians deal with the fallout that can ensue. Look up support groups. Find places where you know people will be cool with the “new you such as  lesbian bars and clubs with girl on girl action Look online for lesbian-friendly places in your area and go support them and make some new friends. Meet other girls who like girls online  and talk about coming out.

Spend some time in front of the mirror


 Go and look in the mirror. If you do not see a beautiful, strong, perfectly capable gay  woman looking back at you then I suggest you call a maintenance man to come get you a working mirror, because that is exactly what you are. Allow yourself to become comfortable with yourself, whether it be your obnoxiously loud laugh, your crooked nose, your awkwardness (guilty), that weird throat-clearing thing you do when you’re nervous, whatever- accept it, love it, move past it. If you learn to love yourself, others will flock to you. I know it sounds way too corny, but I’m serious. It’s really true that you have to learn to love yourself before anyone else can love you.


lesbian selfie pictures


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Love  yourself for being a lesbian


Tell us your story, your problems, your happy stuff, whatever you want to tell us- we’re here. Do me a favor, okay? One day when you have some spare time, sit down and write down things you like about yourself. If you don’t want to write things, then at least think about them, or type them into your phone in the notes section and then erase them or something if you want. Anyway, write down these things and commit them to memory. Remember these things you love about yourself when you feel self-conscious or unsure of yourself. You’ll learn to love that crooked nose or obnoxious laugh or whatever it is that you’re uncomfortable with. . . .  Read more

lesbian selfie pictures
Lesbians kissing wearing short skirts


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If you would like extra guidance... I highly recommend that you grab yourself a copy of The Lesbian Lifestyle Book. It is the only guide you will ever need as a lesbian or bisexual woman. - Click Here